Here’s an interview I did recently for the nonprofitmarketing360 blog. I thought you’d enjoy it!

What are the issues that are keeping your clients awake at night?

GAIL: I think the economy is just a huge issue. People are worried about whether they can raise the money they need or not.

But I’m also seeing a really interesting problem.

What's keeping YOU up at night?

My consulting clients are struggling to learn how to take donors who are identified potential major prospects and develop them to become major donors.

It’s a very delicate, step-by-step, intuitive process to bring a major donor along.

That’s a lot of what I’m teaching my consulting clients, all these little subtleties of developing that type of relationship.

I’m surprised. I thought major donor fundraising is like dating, so I assumed that everyone knew this instinctively.

GAIL: Well, you would be surprised how people feel nervous about it, men and women.

I have a friend at UNC-CH, Eli Jordfald, who gave a presentation called ‘Mastering the Art of the Discovery Call” to a standing-room-only session at an AFP International Conference in Chicago.

She works in the Lineberger Cancer Center at Chapel Hill. She talked about how she takes a prospect who’s identified as having potential, and what she says and does to find out if they really have potential.

It’s a delicate step by step process.

Have the top burner issues changed since you started consulting?

GAIL: I think there’s a little bit more desperation among the clients. A little bit more worry.

I spend time comforting people a lot, and assuring them that if we go through these processes, we can be successful.

So they look to me like the savior, which is scary, but I have a lot of confidence that we can be successful if we do it correctly.

A lot of issues with major donors haven’t changed. Also, I’m still teaching people how to get board members to return their phone calls and read their emails.

I am very interested in keeping up with the front edges of my profession, so I’ve been studying Internet marketing at great length. I’m on Twitter, I’m on Facebook; I have my own blog with over 7,700 followers.

I study subject lines for my blogs and how to write copy, and that’s a whole new skill set for a lot of people.

Nonprofit fundraisers have got to learn how to write for the web, and they’ve got to understand web marketing.

A lot of your work seems to be around boards. Is that a particular weak spot for a lot of organizations?

GAIL: Lord have mercy. It’s amazing what a pain point it is.

It was such a pain point of mine, that I was driven to write my book, Fired-Up Fundraising.

I was frustrated and upset with some of these boards I was working with. So I hired a leadership consultant, Dr. Thomas Griggs, to teach me how to motivate people, how to build teams, and how to get people together.

Leadership consultant Dr. Thomas Griggs inspired my new way to approach boards and fundraising.

He tutored me for a couple of years. And that training has informed a whole new perspective of working with board members that is much kinder, gentler and more fun.

People love it. I do board retreats all over the world. The board members love the work I do with them, because they’re bored too.

I surveyed my mailing list and I asked what is the biggest challenge in fundraising today, and I would say almost half the people, when asked an open-ended question, said something about their boards.

So, I have definitely hit the pain point of all pain points.

Board members are in pain too, because they feel like they’re not making the difference they want to make.

You can’t shake your finger and order them around.

You have to motivate them, make them feel good and successful, and gently bring them into fundraising.

You can’t just say, you’re supposed to go out and raise money, because they don’t know how!

Then they’ll flee. They need to be understood. And here’s why this is important:

According to some research, guess what’s the number one indicator of how much a board member actually gives to the organization?

It’s how they rate the quality of their experience on the board.

Do you think that social media have impacted fundraising practices?

GAIL: Sure. I’m not so sure people are bringing money in through social media, although I have seen some campaigns that have been very successful.

But social media is going to be more and more important. I don’t think it’s impacting the big money right now because most people who give money are older, and they’re the people who are not on social media.

However, I read a recent study that a third of boomers are on a social media site every day. I don’t think we can be ostriches and just stick our heads in the sand and hope this stuff goes away.

I don’t want to be a dinosaur myself. I want to be relevant.

What do you advise clients when they’re looking into all these things and what they should do?

GAIL: I tell them the first thing they’ve got to do is have a great website.

The first thing you need is a terrific web site!

Second thing, they have to do some decent email communications. And third, they should worry about social media.

I see some abysmal websites that are practically driving donors away. So let’s start with the basics. I’m redoing my website all the time.

When did you start blogging?

GAIL: I started with great focus and regularity about a year and a half ago, and I committed to sending something out every Friday morning.

Whether I’m alive or dead, I send out one really good article. I try to make it interesting and snappy and throw my personality into it.

What was your goal when you started?

GAIL: My goal was to get people to subscribe to my content, to sign up for my list.

It was to write really compelling, interesting copy that people thought was valuable, and give it away, and become someone who was trusted.

As web guru Seth Godin says, you earn permission to email people.

They give you permission to come into their lives, into their computers. So that was my goal.

Blogging has been a great marketing tool for my consulting and my speaking.

And now I have almost 100 members of my online training/coaching program, Fundraising Insiders, who are working closely with me to stay on top of the best practices and trends so they can raise lot of money that they urgently need.

Do you feel like the goal has been met?

GAIL: I would like to have more reach.

See, I’m this funny person. I have a personal mission.

My mission is to make the world a better place, what's yours?

My mission is to reach as many nonprofit leaders as possible, inspire them with energy, and give them tools and skills so they can make the world a better place.

So the blogging helps. It’s how I execute my mission along with speaking and training and writing books.

It’s part of my service to the world, and I think it comes back around.

Are any of your clients integrating direct mail and social media successfully?

GAIL: Probably not. But I don’t know how important it is.

I think it’s more important to integrate email and direct mail in what we call multiple-channel fundraising.

You send a postcard, you do a phone call, you do emails, you do a letter, you have your website, and that message is all the same, it’s consistent, it all reinforces each other, and it’s sent out in a sequence.

That’s smart fundraising.

Did you like my interview? Tell me why or why not with a comment below:

Social skills matter.

Kindness and graciousness will take you far!

Appearance matters. Graciousness matters.

How much do they matter to a master fundraiser?

Tons!

I gave a brand new presentation on “Mastering the Soft Skills of A Fundraiser: What They Don’t Teach You in Fundraising 101″ last week at the AFP Toronto Fundraising Congress.

And it was quite a hit.  Fundraisers, both new and experienced, ate this stuff up.

(I got to be totally candid and not politically correct!)

What’s at stake here?

If you are oblivious to your soft skills, you’ll miss important cues that can have everything to do with your career and your ability to raise money.

Your job is at stake. And so is your organization’s reputation, since you are representing it when you are out in front of people.

Don't be oblivious like Winnie the Pooh

Your organization’s mission is at stake, and the amount of money you can raise is at stake.

So maybe, just maybe, you want to study what they don’t teach you!

Five “Soft Skills” of master major gifts fundraisers:

1. Social awareness.

You need to have a good radar. Where’s your attention? On yourself? or on the other guy or gal (your donor)?

If you are self-conscious and nervous, you’ll totally miss the cues from your donor.

And if you are oblivious (we all know these people) you miss the cues as well.

Things like your donor’s body language, eyes, fidgeting, tone of voice – they tell you worlds of information about her interest in your cause.

Your donor will tell you what the next steps are.

But only if you are aware of both spoken and unspoken messages.

You’ll never raise any money if you can’t totally focus on the donor, and get over yourself.

2. Ability to build a trusting relationship.

Building a trusting relationship with a donor is a delicate dance.

How do you build a trusting relationship with a donor?

The most important thing is to do what you said you’d do.

Follow up when you said you would.

Get them what they asked for when they asked. Circle back promptly to them.

And be on time.

Nothing says disrespect more than tardiness. Keeping a donor waiting is NOT cool!

And get out the door when you said you’d leave!

And how do you know when to press forward and when to back off from your donor?

To know when to go away and when to come closer is the KEY to any lasting relationship. Domenico Cieri Estrada

3. Social skills.

Social skills are wildly important.

The ability to come across as polished and gracious is an essential skill. (Moving up in business usually depends as much on this as on your ability.)

In fact, a friend who’s a very successful restaurateur said recently to me:

“In this economy, it’s all social skills.”

What he means is the ability to be likable. To make people feel good. To make them comfortable.

Make it all about the donor and not about you, and you’ll never go wrong!

Pleasant small talk is an essential skill.

The art of “small talk.”

I taught my kids about small talk when they were in elementary school. They learned to how to have polite conversations with adults.

Making pleasant conversation is a learned skill.

Again, make it all about the other person and they’ll think you are a brilliant conversationalist!

4. Good manners.

What is the essence of good manners?

• Kindness and consideration
• Keeping your cool (decorum)
• Putting others at ease

Good manners can get you out of sticky situations.  You can just ignore the offensive behavior as if it never happened. : )

Table manners can be a minefield for many people!

And good manners can help you dig yourself out of a hole.

We’ve all put our foot in our mouth with a donor before.

From misspelling their name, to not giving them the attention they think they deserve, we have lots of opportunities to offend delicate egos.

Good manners will save you time and time again.

5. Etiquette.

The Dali Lama once said, “Know what the rules are, so you can break them properly.”

You need to know the basic rules of etiquette:

How to make a proper introduction, when to pick up your fork at the table, when to hold the door, when to stand when someone comes in the room, where the knife goes, which fork to use, where the elbow belongs, when to wear white, how to pay a compliment.

You need to pay attention to your appearance:

What’s the proper role of makeup, extreme fashion, showing skin, jewelry, stubble, colors?

What is appropriate in your social life may not be appropriate in front of a major donor.

The essence of marketing tailoring your message to suit the needs of your audience.

A smart fundraiser is willing to tailor their personal presentation to fit into the world of a major donor.

You can loosen up with your friends.

Be more formal and professional with your donors.

Bottom line:

All this stuff matters more than you imagine!

Not only does it affect your success raising money, but it also affects your ability to rise in your career. (not to mention socially.)

I know I’m not being politically correct here but I might was well say it all out loud.

I think we could all use more practice in graciousness and making others comfortable.

What do you think? Leave a comment and tell me!

Sandy Rees CFRE has some cool secrets for getting fully funded!

Yes, it really happened at the Knoxville Food Bank.

This is Sandy Rees’ story of what happened when this organization embarked on a “think big with no excuses” mindset.

This is the kind of approach that can change worlds.

And it’s an approach that Sandy brings with her whenever she speaks or coaches.

BTW, Sandy is launching her new book today: “Get Fully Funded: How to Raise the Money of Your Dreams.”

And I have to say it is an amazing book! Join her launch party today. Please pick up a copy of this terrific resource. You know I am very picky about who I recommend – and Sandy gets the gold star.

Here’s the story (imagine yourself and your own board in this same scenario!):

One momentous day, someone asked a question:

One day, the folks at the Food Bank stood back and looked at the big picture.

And they acknowledged something they never really talked about:

“We are only meeting one third of the need in our area. It’s not good enough.”

Then someone spoke up:

“If we totally wanted to meet the need in our area, how much would it cost?”

Nobody had ever thought this way before. It was a new way of thinking, of looking at their community’s situation – and their organization’s opportunity.

They said,

“Hey, we will never get where we want to go unless we change something. What is it going to take?”

And wouldn’t you know, the staff got fired up and embraced this idea. They decided to commit themselves to ending hunger.  Yes, they did.

Sandy added, “it started with a spark. One spark. And the flame spread.”

Sandy said, "It started with just one spark."

The staff got together with the board and figured out the steps to take.

“We figured that we needed three times the food to meet the need. So we started thinking really big!  We changed our fundraising strategies and tripled our budget in three years. And went from 500k to 1.5 million.”

Moral of this story:  a “no excuses” approach.

Too many nonprofits go for what they think they can get. They shoot for a conservative number.

They take the easy way instead of thinking big, considering what they really need and going for that.

I asked Sandy what it took to get everybody in a different mindset.

She said that they just spoke the truth. They had a board retreat to get everybody recommitted and remotivated.  And focused on a new bigger, grander goal.

The new Fundraising strategies worked.

• They stopped doing little events.
• They worked harder on major gifts.
• They added a monthly giving club.
• They got their board more involved.
• They grew their donor base thru direct mail and speaking engagements.

These are strategies YOU can implement today.

Sandy issues a challenge in her new book:

“Why can’t you raise every single dollar you need?

“Why can’t you raise the $ of your dreams?

Knoxville Second Harvest Food Bank raised the money of their dreams!

You actually can.

You just need a NO EXCUSE policy.

Don’t blame your board, your donors, the economy, your budget.

Just take responsibility for what’s happening. And be willing to do the work it takes to make it happen.

Don’t wish for the fundraising fairy to magically rescue you.

Don’t say, “we can’t afford that.” Because fundraising brings in a return on investment. It’s not a black hole.

It’s a multiplier – returning back many times the money invested.

Take responsibility for your fundraising. If its not working you have to figure out what it is and what you need to do.

Bottom Line:

As long as you think you can’t raise the $$, then you can’t.  And if you do think you can raise it, then you will!

Mindset is everything. Like everything else you accomplish in life, it starts in your head.

Here’s my question to you – can you be your organization’s spark plug?

Leave me a comment and tell me if you can!

Last week’s post on the “Fundraiser’s Kiss of Death – Talking Too Much” generated lots of interesting comments.

My readers all enjoyed the story of the donor visit that went sour.

Your Radar is Your Best Fundraising Tool!

But here’s the funny thing:

Why was I consistently able to develop terrific relationships with my major prospects – even when others failed?

There was a very specific reason that I was successful (besides knowing when to shut up!)

I used my radar. And I knew when to get out the door.

Here’s another true story:

I was in New York City, sitting in a lobby in a huge skyscraper.

And I was waiting for my biggest donor prospect of all – a very wealthy hedge fund guru.

As I prepared for the visit, I knew that above all, I wanted to keep and sustain his interest.

And that could be tough. Because . . .

I knew this prospect had a very short attention span.

In fact, it was just about 13 ½ minutes.

And that was on a good day!

(Do YOU have a donor with a very short attention span? Bet you do!)

So my goal, when I came to visit him, was to get out of his office before he was bored and distracted.

I wanted to stay exactly as long as I could have his attention, and not one moment longer.

(You see, if I overstayed my welcome, it might not be able to get another appointment with him. Then all would be lost!)

So I had to employ my secret tool:  my RADAR.

When I visited with him, my radar would go round and round, over and over.

I was watching for signals that would tell me the level of his attention.

I had to watch carefully for signs that told me:

• How interested was he in our visit?
• How interested was he in my cause?
• Was I engaging him or was I boring him?
• When did I need to make a quick exit?

Here was my checklist for what I was looking for:

A donor's body language can tell you alot.

• Body language:

He was open, attentive and interested. Thank god his arms weren’t crossed – good sign.

• Eyes:

He was looking at me with interest, at least for the first 8 minutes.  Then his eyes darted around and I could tell something else had crossed his mind.

I shifted in my seat, wondering if I should leave now.

• Fidgeting:

He nervously fidgeted with something on his desk.  He must have been worked up about something but it wasn’t interfering with our conversation.

• Tone of voice:

Sounded good. Seemed to be in a fairly good humor. I knew he had a bit of a volatile reputation so I was particularly watching for that!

• Smiling:

Yes, thank goodness he was in a positive mindset. I knew better than to visit when he was upset.

• His questions and comments:

These were the most important piece of information of all.

They were telling me what was on his mind — where he stood and what he was thinking about our project.

Totally invaluable. I noted what he asked about to record in my call report.

Then suddenly things changed.

All of a sudden his assistant popped her head in with some silent communication to him. Everything shifted.

He clearly moved on to something else that was more urgent and important.

Suddenly I was old news.

I stood up, smiled and got out the door.  I thanked my trusty radar for helping me  once again.

Don’t ever forget your secret tool.

Your radar won’t fail you if you focus carefully on your prospect. Then you can have the best visit ever.

How do you use your own radar?

Leave a comment and share it with us all -

What’s the kiss of death for every fundraiser?

Don't talk too much: it's the kiss of death!

What can you do to absolutely ensure that you’ve turned your donor off? To be sure the donor never wants to hear from you again?

It’s being boring.

And you are boring when you talk too much.

Talking too much is guaranteed to make your donor’s eyes glaze over.

The last thing you want him to do is to wish you’d leave.

You may think you’re being interesting but he may think you are droning on and on.

Too many nonprofit leaders – CEO’s, development directors and board volunteers alike – all think they need a presentation.

Everybody thinks they need a “pitch.”

You don’t need a pitch: you need to listen.

In the past two weeks I’ve discussed how to develop an engaging elevator speech and then how to use this elevator speech to engage the donor in a conversation.

The point of all this is the conversation. It’s knowing out to bring a donor out.

If you are doing more than 50% of the talking, then you’re dead.

We have a motto in fundraising: Listen Your Way to the Gift.

Listen your way to the gift!

Here’s a real story:

When I was Director of Development for the Kenan-Flagler Business School at UNC-Chapel Hill (go Tar Heels!), I built relationships with many successful alumni.

And I was close to one of our most successful alumni on Wall Street. This gentleman was a multi-million dollar prospect for Carolina. (He eventually signed the billionaire’s Giving Pledge with Buffett and Gates.)

At the time, I was the only fundraiser from Carolina that he was willing to see. That was because I visited quickly and then got out the door.

This guy had a very short attention span. And I knew it.

He could count on me being BRIEF and CHARMING.

He knew I’d never be BORING.

The definition of “charming?” – Letting him do most of the talking.

Then I brought one of the very top university leaders up to New York City to meet Mr. Wall Street.

After we sat down to visit, the university leader started off long-winded.  And he kept talking.

I could see Mr. Wall Street getting a little impatient.  I started getting nervous.

Then the university leader started trying to drop names in front of Mr. Wall Street.

And the names he was mentioning were clearly lower on the totem pole than Wall Street. The people he was talking about were NOT interesting at all to Mr. Street.

See, my Wall Street buddy was hanging out with the wealthiest people in the world. He had a bloody Picasso in his office.

He was a Big Cheese.

And the University official droned on and on. I got more and more nervous.

Things were not going well at all.

What Mr. University should have done was ask Mr. Street his opinion of things at Carolina. He should have sought out some advice and counsel from one of the University’s most prominent alumns.

The best way to be charming is to SHUT UP!

Instead, he talked.  And talked.

If I’d been sitting close to him I would have tried to nudge him under the table. (which I’ve had to do with another college president before!)

Note to self: Never take a nonprofit bigwig out to meet a donor bigwig without establishing ground rules for the meeting first.

Finally, Mr. Street got up and indicated the meeting was over.

When we were at the elevator, he leaned over and whispered in my ear:

“Don’t ever bring that man to see me again.”

Aurrrrgh. Not good.

We had effectively killed any chance for Mr. University to establish a relationship with Mr. Street. So I had to find someone else to get involved here, and leave Mr. University out.

Moral of the story? Listen your way to the gift.

It’s far more important to listen than it is to talk.

Use your elevator speech just to open the door and get the conversation ball rolling.

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